Navigating the in-between

April 13, 2018

I am the immeasurable potential of all that was, is, and will be, and my desires are like seeds left in the ground.  They wait for the right season and then spontaneously manifest into beautiful flowers and mighty trees, into enchanted gardens and majestic forests.

When we have big dreams and a desire to create, the in-between time from when you plant the seeds, to their evolution, can sometimes be a challenging period of time.

There could be some impatience, a want to be further along than where you are, or perhaps some frustration at things not progressing as quickly as you would like.

However, if we’re constantly living for the future, or the outcome, we’re not enjoying the journey along the way.

In mindfulness, we have the qualities of non-striving, and also patience, which can often cause people a great deal of confusion.

“How am I going to achieve what I want if I don’t strive for it?”

“If I sit back, maybe someone else will get there first and I’ll miss out?”

“How will I get anything accomplished?”

In our society, we are so programmed from a young age to achieve, to chase success, get a job, buy a home, have a family, and certain age milestones to a degree of which we are expected to achieve these goals.

Many traditional trappings of the word “success”, that while nice to have, often don’t bring the satisfaction or the contentment that we desire; or we end up exhausted and mentally drained that we can’t even really appreciate them.

Much of the time we’re comparing ourselves to others acheivements, and also as soon as we attain that desire, the goal posts have a funny way of shifting, and there will be something else we believe we need to achieve to be happy and successful.

And in many ways, we do always want to be growing as people and evolving, this is a part of our journey on this planet.  However, we don’t want to do this at the expense of our health, wellbeing, and inner peace.

Are you so fixated on the outcome, that you miss simply enjoying the day to day along the way?

Or are you so focused on things being a certain way, or timeline, that you miss the magic that could happen if you simply let events evolve at their own pace?

Or perhaps you’re so “busy”, that you aren’t spending time with the people you love, or on the things that bring you joy?

So, how do we work towards our dreams and still maintain a sense of peace and contentment within?


Let Go Of Controlling Outcomes And Expectations

It can be challenging not to have expectations, or attachments to an outcome, especially if it’s something you really want; however, if you can let go of trying to control how you think things should be, or the way they should go, the more you are able to be in the moment, and enjoy the journey.  Also, if you’re not so fixated on events or situations arriving in a certain form, you create an openness for things to evolve in new and different ways that could be even better than you imagined.

You know those times when you look back and something didn’t go the way you wanted, but something even better took it’s place, and you couldn’t imagine it being another way, yet at the time there was a lot of resistance around it?  The more you can let go of trying to control the outcome, the easier these transitions can be, and you can flow more with the natural order of life.

Taking Action & Small Steps

I think one of the most misunderstood parts of non-striving, or patience, is that you don’t do anything.  In fact, taking small steps regularly is one of the most important factors in working towards your dreams.  If you’re making regular small movement it can also take the overwhelm off the overall bigger picture.

The more you can enjoy this day to day, and see them as stepping stones towards the destination, rather than wanting to be at the end result, you will have greater satisfaction with where you’re right now in the moment.  It’s also important to acknowledge and take pleasure in the small wins along the way, don’t wait until you reach some huge milestone, life is happening now and you have a right to enjoy it.

See The Lessons In The Challenges

When you hit roadblocks, or perhaps feel that you’ve failed, this is where your growth is happening.  Unfortunately, it doesn’t happen very often in your comfort zone.  Could you look at a challenge or a perceived mistake in a different light?  You’re learning and it’s all a part of the evolution of what you’re wanting to create.  As hard as this can be in the moment, show yourself compassion and kindness for where you’re at.  Sometimes you need to fall several times to get better, or to receive the knowledge that is going to serve you to help you to move towards your dreams.

Less Pushing & Striving – More Being

Pushing and striving take a lot of our energy, especially our mental energy.  Are you aware that when you’re in the process of constant thinking, or mental loops, that you’re wearing out your physical body and energy levels?

In turn this actually gives you less focus and clarity, and less opportunity for those spontaneous ideas and thoughts to arise.

What if you could give time to just be?

Taking time out, whether this be through meditation or yoga, being out in nature, or quality time with the people you love, will actually bring you a greater sense of ease and peace.  Giving time to being, rather than doing, might actually bring you closer to your dreams than you realise.

Patience & Trust

As Jon Kabat Zinn says, “Patience is a form of wisdom. It demonstrates that we understand and accept the fact that sometimes things must unfold in their own time”.   Remembering too, that if you got what you wanted immediately, perhaps you wouldn’t be quite ready for it.  There is a reason that life goes at it’s own pace and needs to evolve slowly.  Imagine having everything you wanted all at once?  You would more than likely end up feeling completely overwhelmed and out of your depth. Trust in perfect and divine timing.

It can also help to develop a trust that things are greater than ourselves; and if you can step back and believe in the higher purpose of your evolution, life has a way of appearing for you in positive ways if you allow it.  The more you can be in this space of trust and patience, rather than control, the more you will also be able to step into the process of flow.  Life seems to show up differently, you can take joy in the unexpected, and be in the present moment of the day to day.

Just like the cycles of life and the seasons of nature, when we plant the seeds of our desires, continue to tend to them frequently, take gentle steps towards them but remain open to them evolving in perfect timing, we create space for them to manifest in ways we might not have envisioned, they may blossom into something more magical and beautiful than you could ever have imagined.

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